That place of Joy, Awe, and Fullness was where I was when I sat down to attend to my emails on Monday morning.
I shared the weekend with 33 amazing ladies. One of those ladies, my precious friend, Amy, sent me a note sharing how she had awoken this same Monday morning.
After reading her words, I realized she was ahead of me. Reveling in God's awesomeness was a great place to be but He had a message to give me through her. I had not yet gone to the place of thinking about what unfathomable things He was going to continue to do. By her email, I was reminded,
God takes NO BREAKS,
He continues the work He began and I praise Him and thank Him for letting me see it by the words she wrote.
May you be blessed and encouraged by the words of wisdom she has allowed me to share.
This is kind of weird, but for some reason God has prompted me with these thoughts to share. Perhaps it is just part of my healing process and I SO want to listen to the adversary right now who is telling me I am a fool to share this with you, if 32 women filled your inbox with messages like this, how could a lady ever get anything done? But, as my note states, I want and WILL do my best to follow His lead, even if I feel like a fool while doing it.
Just like I didn’t WANT to stand up in front of the ladies, I did not WANT to get out of my warm cozy bed this morning. After all, it was 4:30 am - don’t I deserve more rest and sleep after such an emotional weekend? It doesn’t take long for the adversary to creep into our thoughts.
Well, I didn’t get up right away - I laid there with all these thoughts running through my head, words that I felt God wanted me to share. I didn’t mind them while I was laying there KNOWING I would finish listening to them all and get to go back to sleep (yeah!) and when I got up later I would make sure that I put them down on paper and share them. They kept coming….
God informed me that I have not always followed through on His leading…. If I don’t get up right now I would not be listening to Him. Isn’t that what we just spent the weekend discovering? I tell myself that THIS is different - I just WAS obedient to HIM, spilled my heart and opened wounds for all to see, I am sure HE is okay with me getting some rest.
I AM SO BLESSED that HE kept prompting me.
" Why am I here and what is my purpose in life? To glorify HIM."
So easily said, yet here I am in such a simple matter and I want to glorify myself with more sleep. Well, I am tired of living a lukewarm life - which I didn’t think I was doing. As I said, I am a prideful person - and good at it (more pride). I think I have been a good Christian, but right now GOD is calling me to the next level. I accepted mediocracy.
All of this is a heart issue - it isn’t measured by the deeds we have done. That is how we get stuck in this pit. By deeds I may place myself in retirement and live off of my current Christian salary, after all I am secure in my faith and content with what I have. HOWEVER, unlike the material world of money - I WANT MORE. God has more to give me, more HE wants of me and I want my FULL retirement. I want to listen to His EVERY call. And just like in the real world, we have to work for that retirement. The difference is that we will never be laid off, we will never lose our pension, and we get continuous raises paid out in blessings.
None of this so far is what God was prompting me with.
I woke up feeling vulnerable and yucky.
I realized that this is when Satan was going to start setting his traps for us. I have been here before and I am blessed to recognize it. Yet my heart is concerned for all the ladies at the retreat who exposed themselves. We have opened the wound - we lay
vulnerable. We were surrounded by 33 ladies and the Holy Spirit and it was THICK.
Yet, now we have left the safety of our sisters (physically) and in a sense we have lost part of our safety net. This is why some of us didn’t want to go home - not because we don’t miss our families, but because we know what is coming. I know that we will all continue to hold each other up in prayer. I also pray that we follow God’s leading when He prompts us, when He puts somebody on our hearts. It is for a reason - obey Him and take the time to reach out to them.
After reading this again I realize that all the thoughts He woke me with didn't reach the paper and when I try to remember what they were I cannot find them. God used them to wake me and get me out of bed and take action - perhaps He is just testing my obedience, I am not sure and it really doesn't matter. I am thinking right now of Robert Frost's poem
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
I want to get off the main path, the easy route and take that road with Jesus. I keep hearing Vicki's words, God's words to us in
Revelation 3:16 'So because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of My mouth.'
Lord, let that not be me.
In His Love,
Amy



