"I know I have much to learn in my walk with the Lord but my cup will always be filled by the water my sisters pull from the well to quench my thirst and fill my heart."
I am a chronic complainer. Rarely does a day go by that I don't find something to complain about. I also don't really care if my complaining is offensive to those around me. Most times my griping is legitimate, I mean, in my own mind it is anyway. I've also realized lately that my complaining flows with my hormones, lack of sleep, and busy schedule. Is complaining a sin? Usually when I write, I try to avoid over using the same word. If that is something that bothers you as a reader, you might want to skip this one. I've been contemplating this verse all week. Putting it in context and trying to figure out the application for myself. Then this morning WHAM...complaining. I'm a complainer just like the people of Israel. Probably even as bad as the people griping their way through the desert in Exodus. I read through that book and think.....WOW, People! God was right there raining down food from heaven for you and you still complained about it! I would never have complained like they did. Or would I? Do I complain about the people, places, and situations God has brought me to now? Ahem....that's a RHETORICAL question.
Surely the arm of the LORD is not too short to save nor His ear too dull to hear. Isaiah 59:1
So anyway, I was reading over chapter 59 this morning trying to get my head around what was going on here. The people (Israel) were complaining that the Lord wasn't able to rescue them. The true problem though was that they hadn't repented or turned away from their sin. God wasn't delaying their rescue because He wasn't strong enough to save them. He wasn't waiting because they were not shouting loud enough for Him to hear them. He was offended by a very long list of sins that the people were steeping themselves in. Read the chapter. This list goes on and on. Sin had cut the people off from God and that was why He would not listen to them. Can God rescue us from the problems we face? Can He break the power of our sin and help us deal with its consequences?
So how often do we go through our day complaining about the things we have going on? I know I fall into this trap most days. Monday, to be exact. I had fallen into an attitude grumbling about my schedule, feeling overwhelmed, feeling like I couldn't keep on top of things, feeling like my mind wasn't working. What I wasn't realizing was that my attitude was offensive to God. I was trying to work out some things for next year's retreat. I was reading and sorting through some scripture and I couldn't make sense of any of it. I went to our meeting that night and tried to share some ideas and it just wouldn't come out right. I was so frustrated. So since I'm a slow learner, I had to process through this thing the whole rest of the week. Now it's Friday and I finally get it. I started complaining (in my head at least) last Wednesday. That snowballed into me having a yucky heart in church on Sunday and not being able to worship. I wonder if God was like....Hey Penny, just stop singing, you're offending me. It carried over into Monday and spilled out at that meeting on Monday night. Turns out, God has been asking me to do one simple thing and I was dragging my feet on it. That my friends, is disobedience. Delayed obedience is disobedience. Disobedience is sin. My disobedience led me to complaining which led me to feeling like I wasn't close to God which led me to feel like I wasn't hearing Him and he wasn't hearing me. YUCK! I don't like feeling like that.
I am happy to report that I have since obeyed and gotten some stuff straightened out. My heart is joyful again and I can hear God again and I am confident that He hears me. This morning I am really thankful that this was short lived. I see a lot of my sisters struggle along in sin and disobedience for years. Sadly, our enemy feeds on this. He'll whisper in your ear and help you build your case as to why you are right and why you don't need to do this that or the other thing. Do yourself a favor, obey now and ask questions later. You'll be much better off. I wish I had.
It was 5:41 when I looked at the clock this morning. It's Friday. I laid there awake for a least 15 minutes before that, the Holy Spirit speaking to my soul. Today is a brand new day without any mistakes in it. I have 2 friends who have signs hanging in their homes bearing those words. I believe it's an Anne of Green Gables quote. I've never seen that movie but those words were ringing in my ears this morning. God's word tells us in Lamentations that His mercies are new every morning. Yesterday I bought the lie. Yesterday I let Satan tell me a lie and I believed it. Yesterday it took me all day to realize what I was believing! Yesterday it was 5:30 in the evening when I finally said to myself.....WHO TOLD YOU THAT????? Today is a brand new day without any mistakes in it.
Come close to God and He will come close to you. James 4:8
This morning as I seek the Lord and ask forgiveness for the sins of yesterday I am reminded of the grace and mercy bestowed upon me that I do not deserve. I don't want to confess my sins here but the prompt is there. If we are not honest, open and transparent with one another, can we truly grow and bear fruit? So here goes, I hope you'll all still love me when it's done. I have 4 girlfriends who are incredibly precious to me. The 5 of us make up what we loving refer to ourselves as, the Retreat Vultures. We were given that name by the sweetest lady ever, who by the way, keeps asking forgiveness for calling us that. You know who you are, STOP! We love it, we've embraced it and it's a pretty perfect summation of us. Anyway, yesterday I had a completely different blog post done. A really emotional one. I was sitting in a coffee shop editing it and I got a text regarding the blog post. I made a phone call. Something went over me wrong. I can't even put my finger on what exactly. I got in my car and drove to Freeport to run an errand. All the way there I let the enemy build his case for my offense. The accuser. By the time I got to Freeport I was good and offended, yet I couldn't figure out precisely WHY I was offended. So I contacted one of the vultures. I could tell she was a little baffled by what I was complaining about. She tried to correct me, I was having none of it. The day carried on this way, my offended heart getting heavier and heavier. If Satan can keep us offended with each other he renders us ineffective to do the work of the Savior. At abut 4:30 that afternoon I realized what was happening. The devil would love nothing more than to cause division among the vultures. The fact that he was working so hard on it with me yesterday is proof in my mind that we are effective. I cannot share the specific offense here because there wasn't one, only a big fat lie. I will not let that snake drive a wedge between these precious friends and myself. I won't. I love these ladies, we know each other really well, second only to our spouses. We hold each other accountable and we hold each other up. NOT TODAY SATAN! THERE IS THE DOOR!
Monday I was reading my InTouch magazine. There was a devotional for that day that caught my attention. It was titled "The Breaking of Peter". Peter is described as prideful, clever, strong, and impulsive. He was so bold as to say that he would die for Jesus, yet when push came to shove he denied him...3 times. If that wasn't humiliating I don't know what would be. When Peter's opinions differed from Jesus' he even tried to rebuke Him. Jesus' response was to to correct Peter and to teach him, and Jesus did this in front of Peter's buddies on several occasions. So after reading this devotional, I thought wow, I kind of resemble Peter. I felt really bad about that, guilty and maybe a little ashamed. Then I got into my Bible and was reminded that Jesus wasn't done with Peter! He was molding him and shaping him into something that God could use in a mighty way! But how did Peter get that training and teaching? Duh Penny. By spending as much time as possible with Jesus. Well my immediate thought was well yeah, he was with him all the time. He had Jesus at his disposal until he was crucified. But that's when Peter really became what God had intended him to be! After Jesus physically left this world. Read Acts chapters 2 and 3 to see just a little of what Peter was up to after the crucifixion.
In all honesty I wish my quiet time was longer, more intense, more in depth. I wish my prayer time was longer and less distracted than what it is most times. To tell the truth, I do get time with the Lord most every day. This time has proved invaluable because it helps me to respond how Jesus would want me to respond in sticky situations. It helps me reign in my inner Peter, that part of me that is impulsive and shoots off her mouth and says things that she later regrets. Yeah her, I'm sure I can't be the only one that lives with her. But if I weren't spending time with Him in His Word and in prayer He wouldn't have had the opportunity to do that. I need to take the time to come close to God so I can know the difference between truth and lies. The scripture doesn't say God comes close to you and then you come close to Him. Jesus is a gentleman, He won't beat your door down. He'll knock but you have to answer His call.
Ok I'll get to the point now. When we come close to God by spending time with Him in prayer and reading His word He can change our hearts and our perspectives on things. He can give us His eyes to see the right response in hard situations. If you don't have a time and a place in your life where you can come close to God I encourage you to do it. Make a place in your home. Put your bible and pens and paper there. Grab a hot cup of coffee or whatever you like to sip on and spend some time with the Savior. Let him teach your Peter (if you have one) and He'll grow you and give you opportunities to glorify Him. When He gives you those opportunities you'll be excited to be part of His magnificent plan. The song below has really touched me this week, give it a listen.
So I'm studying this verse and here comes that pesky L word again. It keeps coming up. I have to wonder if I'm missing something. It's no secret that I'm a slow learner when it comes to life application of God's word. I have been following Jesus for over 10 years and there are still some things I struggle to apply to my walk. I didn't think I had a problem with love. Obviously, since it's come up the past few weeks, either I'm missing something or I haven't reached a full understanding of the concept. Or maybe one of you readers hasn't fully grasped it? Who knows. Either way we can't go wrong learning more about love and how to love each other can we? Take a look around you. This world could definitely do with more love. That word is used in the 2 greatest commands Jesus gives us.....Love God and Love others. Everything else hinges on these things. So let's talk about our memory verse for this week. Even though it doesn't contain the word love the verses before it have a lot to say about it. It's only fair that we put it in context of the passage. Context is king.
Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts....
Colossians 3:15
I enjoy memorizing these shorter versions, it's easier to catalog them in my very busy brain. While I try to keep them in the forefront sometimes they get lost between the swim practice category and the what's for dinner category. Studying them more in depth helps me keep them up front, where they belong. This verse is part of a passage that talks about relationships and how the peace of Christ is supposed to sit as judge or umpire or referee in those relationships. So let's start at verse 12, remember I'm using my NLT translation.
Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other's faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.
Tenderhearted mercy? Make allowance for other's faults? Clothe myself with love? I read down that list and see a list of things that I personally fail miserably at every single day. But what I'm realizing is that is wrong thinking. I shouldn't think about how much I miss the mark but I should look at these virtues as things to strive for. Things that I should work on little by little. Like tending flowers planted in a garden.....LOLOLOLOL oh I just cracked myself up there. See, I'm horrible at growing anything. I hate house plants almost as much as I hate birds. I think the feeling is mutual because every time I touch a plant it up and dies on me. So I need another metaphor here. These virtues are like a beautifully knitted sock, every row adds a lovely stripe or fair isle pattern adding to the beauty of the garment. When my goal is to grow these virtues more in my own life they start to crowd out other things that are less desirable. Like selfishness, anger, unforgiveness, pride, and jealousy. I like it when others apply the virtues Paul talks about to me and my shortcomings. I like when people are gently and patient with me. It makes me feel good when people are kind and forgiving to me. All these things listed here I'm quite happy to accept from others. So, why is it so difficult for me to give them?
I'm sure I can't be the only person ever to wish someone would get what they deserve. I'm being honest here. Sometimes we call in accountability or throw it in the responsibility category. I mean if the offending party had just done this, or said that, or wouldn't have had that attitude or would just grow up or whatever the case may be. We are told to relate to these situations with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, gentleness and patience. And then Paul throws in that word.....REMEMBER....God forgave you so you must forgive others. Yeah, thanks for the reminder Paul. I love you Paul, I really do but you're killing me smalls! Ok ok I'm over my little temper tantrum.
So this is where the peace of Christ comes in. My life application commentary says it so perfectly. Paul tells us to let Christ's peace be umpire or referee in our heart. Our heart is the center of conflict because there our feelings and desires clash - our fears and hopes, distrust and trust, jealousy and love. How can we deal with these constant conflicts and live as God wants? Paul explains that we must decide between conflicting elements by using the rule of peace. Which choice will promote peace in our souls and in our churches? I like the sound of that. I want to promote peace. Don't you? I want to promote peace in my heart, in my home, in my church, in all of my relationships. When your relationships are all in order and at peace don't you feel good? I know I do. That's why God tells us to do these things. That's why He tells us to love and to cultivate these virtues in our lives. He wants us to be at peace, to promote peace and to have peace in our churches because it's for our good and for His glory. Always for HIS GLORY.
